Looking back..................

March of 1997, second issue of The Outcast is released. The majority of the interviews in this issue were provided by Jill G., due to her publication folding. I don't really have much to say about this issue, with the exception one could easily take note I was still learning my art.

(Intro. from printed form issue #2)

A NEW BEGINNING, ANOTHER JOURNEY......... Well, first of all, I just want to welcome to the world my newly born son, Miguelito. As you can all see, he resembles his father. Who knows who the mother is? I’m just a little whore who likes to screw everyone. Isn’t everyone like this? Any way, I dedicate that to J.S. Till we meet again, I hope you suffer in your own vomit! The truth will be seen/heard soon enough! Hello, and welcome to another issue of The Outcast. Finally! Well, first of all, I would like to apologize to Von and Deaden and Johnny and Unleashed. During my move, I lost the tape that had both interviews, and not to mention the whole review of last years Champaign Fest. You talk about pissed-off! Oh well, shit happens. As some of you might know, and to those of you that do not know, I have re-located. Unfortunately, the thing that really sucks is that I’ve moved to one of the most pathetic places in existence. Yes, I'm still on earth, but this town is worse than Anna, and that's hard for me to believe! Anna, being that the majority of the population are red-necks (about 50%)/oppressing christians/white-trash/etc.. I've moved to a town that is actually, well, all red-neck + all the other "great" aspects of Anna all rolled into one. The sad thing is, I totally miss Anna, but mainly because that is where most of my friends are. Thankfully, to keep my sanity, I drive down to Anna every weekend to partake in all the usual activities my friends and I share. I've moved to a small-ass town, smaller than Anna actually, and I’m now living (for the time being) with my mom and the rest of my family. It's quite a change considering I haven’t really lived with my family since I was 16. But damn, the food and the "relaxing" environment is quite a difference. It has some advantages, but then again it doesn’t. The main reasons I moved here are to concentrate on my zine and to pay off my freakin credit-cards, and not to mention mooch as much as I can while I have the chance. (He, he.)

I want to say hello and send a big hug and kiss to Jill G. from Mortal Coil Records. Due to her zine folding, (R.I.P) I accepted her offer and used all her interviews she had done prior to her zine folding and put them all in mine. If it wasn't for Jill, I'd probably still be trying to get interviews for this issue. Any way, thanks Jill, and see you soon!

Also, if you’re a band or a record label who has sent us something to review and can not find the review within this issue, relax, it’ll be in the next issue, which is already in the works. I’m kind of sloppy when it comes to reviewing things that arrive before other things in the mail and what not. So don’t sweat it, you’ll see it next time. Hopefully sooner than the time it took me to put out #2. Now that I actually own a computer, (Thanks again Brian.) I should be able to release this a tad sooner than the others. Also, due to time and space, I was forced to leave out the zine reviews. But never fear! My next issue will be packed with zine reviews, so please be patient to all those who sent me a zine to review.

What is it with hair? I know it’s a part of a metal heads life style/image, well to some, but come on people, it’s just hair! So many people, young and old, gave me so much shit for cutting all my hair off. Up to this day, I still get looks. O.k., so maybe I do look like a prep, or maybe even a little gay, but come on! The thing that truly pissed me off was the fact that a lot of the older crowd, and even some of the younger crowd, commented on my “new look”, and even started talking to me. Why the fuck would they start talking to me now is beyond me, it’s still me. That same ol crazy ½ ass Mexican, who supposedly worships the Devil, who supposedly sells drugs, etc… Just because of long hair I was “evil” or something. How fucking dumb I must say!

Well, if you’re a first time reader, let me explain what our purpose/goals are here at The Outcast. Well, it’s actually simple/self explanatory. The first purpose is pretty obvious; expand and support sick and not so sick metal to the supporters of the underground.

The second purpose to my creation is personality. As you read through this issue, you might notice that I tend to tell either stories about myself, friends, or just things that are a part of my life. I like to share experiences in my life with the readers, so that they can get to know me better. I just don’t want this to be another zine that is just about music you know? Sure that’s the main goal, but it must be more than that. As each issue grows/expands, you will see more and more things/experiences/personal things about myself, and others, that has happened in our lives. Maybe not as much in this issue, but more so in the future. Some things will surprise a lot of people, and some things might just shock the hell out of others. No matter how obscene, moronic, immature, gay, horrible, ignorant, abominable, detestable, humorous, lovely, enjoyable, “harmful”, ungodliness… well, you get the point. If I say something about myself that is just not right to you , all I can say, it’s me. ? My zine is sorta like my diary. I gather all my thoughts and just think about certain things that have happened in my life and throw it in my zine. Things that people will be able to relate to and then hopefully get something out of it. And I’m not talking about getting an erection or wetting your panties either. Third, through this zine, I have met so many people. I love meeting different people involved in the scene. The scene dead? It’s pretty big in my eyes. Sure it isn’t in your town, but it’s world wide! Well, that’s my outlook any way. Any way, back to the point. Through my zine, my good friend Lieff is able to express himself, and I believe he truly adds character to The Outcast. My somewhat new friends; Elisabeth, Dea, Paul and Jill, whom I met during the creation of my first issue. We’ve already became great friends, through mail and from meeting at metal festivals. Jill is expressing her self in my zine and so is Elisabeth, and I am forever greatful for their help, support, and friendship. I also met Nicolas, who contributed in my first issue, but I haven’t heard from him in a long time, so I don’t know if he will contribute later on or not. But I hope he does, he also added another feeling to The Outcast. Where are you Nico? Also to the line-up now, Torgo. He hasn’t contributed that much yet, but hopefully with time he might contribute more. I just met him not to long ago, and through our writing back and forth, I believe I have found another friend. Ahhh… how gay. Any way, the whole point to The Outcast is; expression and honesty. I love for people to express themselves, whether it be love, hate, anger, sorrow, etc.. Especially on paper. I love to write. I love to express my self. I just hope people can understand where I’m coming from you know? I mean, even if it’s crazy shit. For example, I don’t know if I really wanted a lot of people to know this experience, but after talking to Elisabeth and dwelling on it, I decided, what the Hell? Most people don’t like to talk about masturbation, I on the other hand don’t think it’s a big deal. I know a lot of women who masturbate. What about guys? Well, 99.9% of the male population masturbates, while the other 1% is just flat out lying to your face if they say they don’t. Any way, most guys who spank it probably have something to clean up with after they are done spankin the ol monkey, I do any way. Thing is, never, under any circumstances, leave your clean up towel, or whatever, where your mom might find it. You talk about embarrassing! Well, if you haven’t figured it out yet, I was a victim of snoopin mom. Not only did she find the towel I had cleaned with, she had the crazy ass nerve to ask me about it. I always joke around with my mom and grandma about masturbation, but this time it went in the deep end. See, it’s shit like that, that makes life worth living. Don’t ya think?

So, why such a name? The Outcast. Don’t you ever feel like an outcast in life? I’m not talking about little bull shit either. But because you have something. Something about your self isn’t “right”. Well, according to “societies” outlook. I’m talking about shit like; your either gay, to fat, to “different”, etc… You know, that little thing in your life that people, or yourself, just totally look down on? When people look down on someone for something, or they don’t really have friends, I’ve always tried to “analyze” why people don’t like them. If it’s something really stupid, then I usually try to become their friend. Ah, how gay. Yeah, maybe it does sound gay, or whatever, but man, fucking grow up people! Why so much fucking hate? Such oppression? I don’t want to be apart of it you know? I am who I am, and I am happy with myself, no matter how fucked up in the head I know I am or other people know I am. Acceptance for who you are is very important in life. Yeah, maybe I am lucky, and haven’t gone through half the shit you other people have gone through, but that doesn’t mean I don’t give a damn or dwell on the fact that your family abuses you, or you’ve been molested, etc… But when I hear about shit like that, trust me when I say I get involved. If someone in my family (including friends) gets hurt by someone else, fucking right I’m stepping in. But, you must think before you act. It could really ruin a friendship or something to that effect. Man, I’m rambling eh? See, that’s how I get when I start dwelling on shit. Being an emotional/dwelling type of guy can suck sometimes. Everything I just said up there probably didn’t make any sense? Any way, The Outcast name isn’t only a logo or a name for a zine, it’s a title that many of us in this hate- filled ball carry. It’s a name for the people around me who share the same feelings, yet different ones as well.

Now, now. To all you people reading this and who are thinking; “Does this guy think he’s perfect?” or “Does this guy think he can change me?” or “Is he trying to force his beliefs on me?” or whatever your precious little mind is thinking right now. Well, I’m far from perfect, and I have many things about myself that I myself consider negative. (That I will not share at this point in time.) But that doesn’t mean I’m not aware about my “problems”. I just hope I continue to grow mentally, but in a non-fucked up way. At this point in time, I wonder if I’ll ever change? Oh well, that’s another issue.

In other related news, that has the same story line to my introduction, those of you who read my first issue, might recall the name; Andy George. Yes, that racist son of a bitch that pissed off and offended so many easily offended people, including me! It’s so funny how certain words can make the blood boil. Well, when I went to the Champaign fest last year, after watching the guy, and him staring back at me and the rest of the El Pecado guys out every so often, I decided to approach him. Suddenly, out of the blue, we just started throwing punches left and right, and then Von jumped…. O.k., enough bull shit. Actually, I approached Andy and we chatted a few min. Then, to break the ice, we went to the movies and then out to dinner. Such a delightful dinner it was. No, in all seriousness. Some of you might think I’m “stupid” or an “idiot” for becoming friends with Andy, but once you get to know somebody, and actually get to know them, and actually have an intelligent conversation, you start to see where he is coming from. Does that still make him wrong? Who the fuck are you to judge his “world”?! I’ve come to realize something, not to long ago actually. Until you are directly in someone else’s position in life, and experience that certain thing that that individual has gone through, then, and only then, can you say your $.02 worth. Why fight over something you’ve never experienced? I finally got a hold of one of his zines, and this one little part made a lot of sense to me, here it is.

“One more thing I ought to say before I split. I have received quite a few negative responses concerning the content of this magazine. Seeing as how everyone is quick to judge me, I should say this. I am not a skinhead or a Klansman. The racist comments are there out of humor and is NOT to be taken seriously! I have received some of the most absurd and ridiculous letters and ‘zine reviews I have ever seen! You think I’m offensive? What the fuck is everyone else trying to promote? Death! Satanism! Corpse fucking! Infant killing! Etc… And I get shit upon for not being liberal! Oh, Satanism doesn’t offend anyone, but if I call some Mexican guy a spic, all of a sudden I’m some kind of despised asshole. Well, Fuck you!! If I offend you, then don’t fucking write me! It’s as simple as that.” Some of you might agree with what he says, others will not. Trevor, El Pecado's guitar player, still didn’t think that justified his comments, but I have a different opinion. Andy’shumor might not be for everyone, but then again, everything in life isn’t for everyone. I’m sure some of you reading my zine will not like some of my humor, well if there is any humor. Well, enough rambling. Also to add, the first issue of The Outcast will always be made available to those who are interested. Interviews include; Lividity, Angel Kill, Lunatic, Internal Bleeding, Turd Perversion, Hell Bound, Towpath, S.S. Bounty Hunter, Vital Remains, Darken, Your Shapeless Beauty, Iced Earth, Immolation, Angel Corpse, Samael, and Rotting Christ.

I hope you enjoy this second installment to my life, and I hope you can at least appreciate the honesty my friends and I have shared with you. Until next time, open your mind, but most of all, your heart. A special thanks goes out to anyone who has (and hopefully always will) contributed to my zine. I’m sure you guys and gals know who you are. I want to say thank-you to all the record labels and bands who have sent me CD/tapes for review, and the few who believed in my work to be kind enough to hook me up with interviews, even if it was just your “job”. I want to say a big extra-mega-thanks to my mom for helping my pathetic ass type, and just for being there for me all my life. I want to thank all my friends for being there for me when I was in a bad mood, or for whatever reasons, you all know who you are. A big hello to every one I write to. All pictures were either taken by me, or were sent by the labels/bands featured, thanks. Last but definitely not least, you. Without you, the reader, supporter, fan, etc.. none of us would exist, and I mean everyone in the scene, not just my little ass.

Does ANYONE have MERCILESS - “Treasures Within” that they are willing to sell on CD? Will pay for a reasonable price. Hell, at this point in time, I’ll settle for a dubbed copy! I have been searching for this CD forever! (Note from 2004 - I still haven't found this release, so if anyone out there can get a dub/copy for me, please let me know!!)

“The Outcast” logo was drawn up by David and The Dark arts. Thanks for everything bro., especially your friendship. Front cover was made possible by Russel Nolan with a few added features done by me. Writers: Lieff, Elisabeth, Jill, Torgo, Paul, Mike Art: David and The Dark Arts Editor, etc.: Mike Interviews featured and other: Tiamat and The Great Kat. Happy 23rd Birthday Mike!!

Interviews NOT featured that were also in the 'zine:

Eternal Suffering, Metal Mafia Zine, Coroners Report, The Headless Illustrator, Drohm, Theatre of Tragedy, Gholes, Flesh Grind, Ritual, Transcendence, Regurgitated Corpse and Morbid Entree. Other subjects that were NOT featured on the site that were featured in the magazine:

Extreme Scene Report - written by Mike Coles The 15 Bedroom Golf Rules Supporters of our words - letters from readers Words from the Shadows - Commentary by Tom "Torgo" Dillon (R.I.P brother.)