Outcast
Issue #6

ISSUE 6 MAIN PAGE

THE OUTCAST MAIN PAGE

In this issue:

• Interview with Janne Wirman of Children of Bodom

• Interview with Robin and Andrew Mandell of Ballydowse

• Interview with Nathan, Boy Sets Fire vocalist

• The Conquering

• "5 Minutes Before"

• Interview with Victoria S. of Damad

• Interview with SCSI

• Interview with Mike Hruboucak of Devine Rapture

• Interview with Peter and Michael of Opeth

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The Conquering

If you read the story in my last issue entitled; "In My Eyes of Death", you might recall reading; "I don't really have any more stories on this subject, and I hope that nothing happens to anyone I love while I'm completing this issue. I kept thinking to myself while I was writing this, how strange it would be if something should happen to someone close while I wrote this."

So the short story begins.......

It was that time of the year again, a birthday. My friend Kari and I were driving up to my sisters to celebrate my nephews second birthday.

(Thank you (but I'm also sorry) for being there with me chiquitita!) We were meeting my mom, my grandma, my brother, and my younger sister at my sisters up in Nashville. So we finally arrive and the first thing my older sister tells me as I step out of the car is that uncle in Mexico called and that (his aunt), our great aunt, had died. The first thing that ran through my mind were my two cousins living in Mexico, fatherless, and now motherless. They had witnessed their father's death and now they had to go through their mother's death.

How sad it is losing both parents at such a young age. At least she died in her sleep. A heart attack, just like their father.

My first thought was to leave before my mom and the rest of the family arrive. I didn't want to go through that with them. Selfishness? As Kari and I headed towards the car to leave, I felt a strong urge to stay and face the fear and sadness within. As I sat and waited for my family to arrive, I just kept thinking how ironic that this call would come on a birthday and one week before my previous issue was to be released. And as I sat and waited some more, the aforementioned intro. (up above) kept running through my mind.

So they finally arrive and I must say it was hell holding back the tears, knowing what I knew, and not being able to say a word due to my uncle wanting to tell my mom the news. What felt like an eternity, the phone finally rang.

My sister hands the phone over to my mom and the first thing I hear her say is; "Me lo juras!? Me lo juras!?" (Do you swear!? Do you swear!?) She starts crying, she goes and tells everyone else the news, my brother kicks a hole in the bathroom wall, in short, we're all pretty bummed. My mom hangs up the phone with my uncle and she immediately calls my cousin's in Mexico. As the tears finally begin to pour out of me, I grab the phone from my mom and hide in the closet, telling my cousin how sorry I am and how I wish I could be there with him. It was a sad situation being so far away from the people you love in such a time of need. After our "conversation", I came out of the closet (not funny guys!) and started walking towards the livingroom. Passing my niece's room, I notice my "little" brother sitting on her bed crying. I walked in, held him, and started crying with him. Sitting there, he mumbled; "Why do people have to die?" At that instant a strange grin crept up on my face. I wiped away the tears I began telling him the best way I knew how about why things happened and why people "had" to die. I then began telling him about all the time he had "died" when he was a baby and how it affected my life. Sitting and talking some more, I asked him how grandma was. I was expecting the worst (as I usually do), her dying of a heart attack hearing the new of her sisters death.

Walking up behind her, I hugged her and expected to see her in tears.

Tearless, she just looked up at me and asked me why she had to die. She couldn't understand why God would take her away so soon (she was the youngest of three, my grandma being the oldest). The entire time we were there, not one tear fell from her face. Up to this day I still wonder why? My guess is that it didn't hit her until she arrived in Mexico for the funeral. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to make it.

Now, to explain such a title for this story. It was the first time in my life that I actually "faced" death and laughed at it for attempting to destroy my day. What would have happened if I would have taken off?

Knowing my family and they knowing how I've dealt with death in the past, I probably would have given my mom and my grandma a heart attack. My family and I always think the worst!

The rest of the day my family and I laughed and talked about old times that we had shared with my aunt and our uncle down south. We were all there for each other and regardless of what had happened, we still managed to have a nice little birthday for my nephew, who's getting ready to turn three. So the cycle of life and death continues.......

shim
   
 

 
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